The Denver Male Stereotype
We’re not from here.
Denver is a desirable place to live. It has great culture, affordable housing, friendly people, an abundance of things to do, a public park every where you turn and a 30-minute ride into the Rockies. If you’re a guy that grew up in (insert boring state like Iowa here), it’s a no-brainer to end up here; in one of the greatest states in America.
We ski, hike, camp, fish, climb, bike and paddle.
We’re all outdoorsy, but we hate the word “outdoorsy”. Please don’t use that word.
We occasionally grow full beards.
No goaties, chinstraps or soul patches. I’m talking the trustworthy kind of beard.
We have 5+ flannel shirts and a Patagonia jacket.
The jacket could also be Mountain Hardwear or North Face.
We’re training for a race of some sort.
Denver is ranked ninth in Most Active Cities according to Men’s Health Magazine. It makes sense. There’s some kind of race every weekend here. Marathons, decathlons, biking, boating, obstacles, zombie chases… there are literally hundreds to choose from.
We go to ski porn movie premieres.
I used to think Warren Miller was a congressman. Now I know him as the extreme skiing film maker that sells out the Paramount theater every year with his latest movie premiere. It’s a great place to hear an abundance adjectives such as “epic”, “sick”, “gnarly” and “tight”.
We drive an SUV.
It has at least one exterior rack installed. It’s probably a Subaru or a Jeep. It has an ironic or obscure outdoorsy brand sticker or two on the bumper.
We have a dog.
It’s probably a labrador, but it could also be a Bernese, Golden Doodle, Visla or Aussie mix.
We’re beer snobs.
If it’s not a small batch microbrew made with six different kinds of hops and barrel-aged in 25-year oak, it’s probably just as good as a PBR.
We paid only slightly less for our mountain bike as you did your motorcycle.
It’s pretty fantastic though. The more you pay, the better the bike. I’ve also found, the better the bike, the more repairs it needs.
We eat healthy and organic.
This is probably our northwest neighboring city (Boulder) rubbing off a little. We’re not quite full-blown hemp milk over pine cone granola w/ goji berries, but we’re getting there.
If we don’t like bluegrass music, we will eventually.
Just give in. It’s everywhere and it’s fantastic.
We can’t see moving back.
I think it’s a much better idea for all of our friends and family scattered around the country to move here, than for us to live anywhere else.
